Men's Magazines??

I was studying in Starbucks when a guy friend from the fraternity next door came up to say hi. We struck up a conversation and eventually found ourselves talking about the future. It turns out he had been offered the position of Art Director at Playboy Magazine.

After having a good laugh about it, he got serious, wanting to know my legitimate opinion. He is not ‘that kind of guy’ and was really worried about working in such an environment. Naturally, to help him decide, we did some research and I ended up browsing the Playboy site for longer than I should have.

Of course there were pictures of women everywhere – that I expected – although I will admit, I was surprised to find an interview with a well-known economist and piece on biopolitics. But I did not find a single article on art or even men’s fashion.

Our findings resulted in an interesting conversation about gender roles and males tendency toward self-asserted leadership. Men today want to be leaders because they were told they ought to be, but there is no longer a sense of earning it or deserving it. Leadership is awarded to the worthy, meaning not everyone can or should lead. But men are told if they are not this masculine type that likes motorcycles and hordes of women, they are weak, not fit to lead. Just as women are told they must fit a certain body type in order to feel desired.

I know not all men’s magazines are as ridiculous as Playboy, but it is an interesting thing to remember. Men face very similar pressures women do, a lot of which stem from gender-segregated magazines. For some reason, gender magazines feel the need to either enforce or defame gender roles; but either way it is still all about gender roles.  

The Uncanny Tweeter

Today I read an article in WIRED about ghost tweeters (people who professionally tweet for celebrity accounts.) The article talked about how most celebrity online personalities are actually just publicists and their interns, creating a type of uncanny valley, where our virtual selves seem to be real but are not.

The Uncanny Valley was first coined by a man named Masahiro Mori in 1970 but just recently reentered the public consciousness. Those who know me know I am obsessed with the idea of the uncanny ever since reading Sigmund Freud’s Uncanny, derived from E.T.A Hoffmann’s The Sandman. I have long thought technology possessed the same eerie, deathlike characteristics of the uncanny, but I just never had the words to describe it... until now. 

Basically the idea is that the more we try to stimulate human brains, the less we are going to use our own and the more skeptical and weirded out we are going to feel.

The perfect example of this is the ghost tweeter. Annie Colbert, professional celebrity tweeter, told her story to Wired about what it is like to make a living from mimicking celebrities’ voices and behaviors so she can become their virtual selves. It is definitely an uncanny situation. Colbert embodies her clients so she can impersonate them via social media and pass as a genuine voice. This is unique to the age of technology. Never before could a person have so many different selves: the most distinct being in-person and online. The online self – crafted, copied and mass-produced – is incredibly uncanny. It is like the real self, but strangely different. Our virtual reality provides a place that is familiar but uncharted and peculiar, simply because no one knows if the person behind the virtual self is the real person. Tensions arrive when technology starts to take over our independence. We embrace it up to a certain point until nature red flags it for us and we see the familiar human-like object become human. Somewhere – deep down – we know it is… uncanny. 

The Surprising Reason for Increased Volunteerism

The number of volunteers in America has increased to 64.3 million according to a report last week from the Bureau of Labor Statistics. After declining numbers in 2010, last year had the most volunteers since the recession with 26.8 percent of the population volunteering at least once from September 2010 to September 2011.  While the increase is just a slight jump of .05 percent, experts believe the trend will only continue to improve.   

“I was sort of surprised [by the increase],” said Melissa Gaeke, former executive director of USC’s Volunteer Center. “I would have thought it might have been bigger because [volunteering] allows people to sift into a new job arena and helps them continue to build their network.”

Recent studies have shown the recession can actually help the volunteer sector, mainly because people have more time. 

Wendy Biro-Pollard, an expert in non-profit management, suggests volunteering is a tool for career development, especially when normal jobs are difficult to obtain. 

“Volunteering gives people something to do while job hunting that allows them to feel good about themselves,” wrote Biro-Pollard in an article for Northwest Regional Educational Laboratory. “Volunteering is a way to stay active and stay in touch. Hard economic times give people a renewed sense of compassion and a better understanding of how others are struggling.”

Volunteering during recessions can also be beneficial for women, according to a study from WOMENS WAY where 83 percent of participants found volunteerism to be a “cost effective tool for career development.”

The women in the survey reported acquiring leadership, problem solving and communication skills through volunteering that helped with their job hunt. 

But volunteerism can also be a luxury item. So while the highest demographic of volunteers in the labor force are the 33.3 percent of part time employees volunteering, the other significant demographics are white, middle aged women with a college degree or higher. As people have more time to spend, the chance they will volunteer seems to increase. 

"The more discretionary time you have the more able you are to make choices to do that sort of thing," said Gaeke. "The amount of time people have is a determinate for whether they volunteer or not and the recession makes that more challenging... they might have lots of time but they also have lots of need to have real dollars."

Sorority Invites

Every once in a while I have enough time to pause and reflect on life’s absurdities. In an effort not to stay in the abstract for too long, let me give you a couple examples. Have you ever been driving and suddenly wonder how a little metal strip can make a huge machine start to move? Have you picked up a phone and marveled at how a voice travels instantly to your ear? Or been creeped out by Siri? Well today – having nothing to do but sit at my computer for way too long – I started to reflect on yesterday’s events and wondered similar things about my life.

Last night Theta had an invite -1920’s themed: long gloves, fake cigarette holders and fedoras included. I remember sitting at dinner, looking around and laughing at the absurdity of it all.  But it wasn’t until today did I get to process.

Here is what I found to be most ironic about sorority invites....

1)    A line of men and women being herded and packed into a bus: normal.

2)    Walking down the street in a bra and mini skirt: casual.

3)    Despite having pizza on the counter and food at the venue, everyone going to dinner before the event: expected.

 

4)    Roller-skating in a restaurant: trendy.

5)    Treating the life-threatening situation of dodging cars as a game: typical.

6)    The most exciting part of the night being a mad dash to get the last bagel: routine.

7)    Having a security guard who kicks all visitors out at 2pm: customary.

8)    Living in a house of 60 women with constant music, intense amounts of hair products and more estrogen than I can deal with: my life.

Public Dancing is Always a Good Thing

The average teenager spends over seven hours a day using a smart phone, computer, or other electronic device, another hour and a half texting and an additional half-hour talking on cellphones. That means almost every second we are awake we spend glued to a screen. I am not claiming to be different – or better, but I do wonder what we miss when lost in a virtual reality.

Ironically my answer came only moments later when my computer battery died. Sometimes providence has a funny way of mocking me: like when the only thing in my fridge after a workout is ice cream, or when ‘searching’ for my newest crush I accidentally type his name as my status. I have learned to be skeptical of destiny’s interventions.

So there I am, sitting alone in Starbucks with no computer charger, no music, no entertainment and no motivation to get up and walk home. And normally I would never let myself appear bored but in this instance I resolve to sit there – indefinitely. My arms hang lazily by my side, my jaw is visibly open and my eyes glaze over pretending to fixate on the corner wall.

After a solid five minutes of zoning, I snap back into reality only to find I have been awkwardly gazing into the eyes of a Starbucks worker sweeping up the floors.

But before embarrassment can take root, he winks as if silently permitting me to join his private party.

Securing my undivided attention the Starbucks worker, wearing a green apron body rolls to the right. Caught off guard, I muffle a laugh. But he is un-phased. His right foot taps methodically on the floor, starting the beat. Slowly and quietly at first, his fingers snap according to the tempo. Then almost involuntarily his knees and hips join in shifting their weight from the right to the left. His head is the last to follow and he is now fully engaged, swaying in one graceful motion – every muscle and limb playing its part. Lastly the man’s broom adds to the rhythm, tapping the cold, hard tiles as if a part of a Gene Kelly routine.

I notice my eyes start to widen and my sheepish grin turns into an amused smile. Leaning forward I scoot my chair even closer to get in a more direct line of vision.

At only 5 feet something inches, the Lord of the Dance shifts his weight to the left in preparation for a turn. But instead of spinning he jumps, launching forward over to the condiments island. Fully abandoned and fully oblivious to anyone around, his brisk walk turns into a swagger and his casual hum graduates to back up vocals. 

Suddenly aware of the background music I listen to the lyrics. Nina Simone is singing directly at me “It’s a new day…. and I’m feeling goooooooooood … feeling good...”

I know my friend with the mongo diamond earrings is feeling it too. He owns the dance floor. The store is his stage and we are all merely accidental observers.

           

But our flow comes to an abrupt halt as the Starbucks manager calls “Baby” out of the corner and into the storage room. For the first time since the wink, the stranger looks up and sends a subtle head nod my direction. Embarrassed of being caught starring for a second time, I try to act cool while frantically searching for something to redirect my attention. But as I look around the room my heart sinks.

In a room of 40 I am the only one without a laptop open. In a room of 40 I am the only one who saw pseudo Shane Sparks in action.  In a room of 40 I am the only one present in our world – engaged in reality. With 40 people in a room I am alone. 

My challenge to you: Go dance somewhere public... It is always a good thing! 

Welcome

As you can tell I have revamped the blog. The posts about studying in Europe are still here but traveling will no longer be the focus of my thoughts.

This is a place where My Ideal World can exist.

I am convinced my purpose is to uplift and encourage women to find their value in Christ. So often we feel like old, worn out pieces of jewelry thrown into a jumbled mess - sold from owner to owner.

But I will not give up.

In My Ideal World we are all precious stones.